How to Handle Happy Hour as an Intern

Being an intern usually means two things: you’re the youngest person at the company and the lowest man on the totem pole. While this isn’t usually a bad thing, it does get more complicated when after-work events like happy hour start to pop up. If you’re not 21, you feel immediately excluded. And if you are 21 you’re still not 100% sure if you should go. It’s the ultimate #adulting challenge, and can result in major work faux pas if you’re not smart about it. However, happy hour or “grabbing drinks after work” can be a good opportunity to get to know your coworkers a little more personally, and also make a long-lasting impression.

When in doubt, feel it out

Were you personally asked to come along, or just part of a mass email to the whole company? Were all the interns invited but no one else can go? “If it’s initiated by your coworkers or your boss, then it’s acceptable to go, but I feel like an intern should never be the one to say, ‘Let’s do happy hour!’ even if they’re 21,” said Maddie, who’s interning for a digital publication.

Ultimately deciding to go to happy hour comes down to circumstance. “Pay attention to what people around you are doing, and read the room,” advises Cheryl Franklin, Director of the internship program at Newhouse in NYC. “Usually if your supervisor wants you to come along they’ll be excited, and you’ll be able to tell.” Every situation is different and going to happy hour may end up being determined by simply whether you want to go…or not!

Keep it low key and limit yourself to one drink

If you do decide to tag along, a good rule of thumb to follow when drinking around people you work with is: one drink, no shots. Getting sloppy drunk will end up haunting you forever, as you can be sure the story of the “crazy drunk intern” will spread around the office. “You only want to be remembered for all the great work you did, not your drinking habits,” said Franklin.  

You also don’t know how your coworkers are going to act when drinking, and if they’re going a little overboard, you don’t want to be a part of it. “Remember that you don’t know these people outside of work. They may be awesome and fun coworkers but when people get into a social setting, and especially when they start drinking, you just don’t always know how someone will act,” said Isabella, a former intern for a large news media company.

Being 21 doesn’t mean you have to go, or have to drink

If you are 21 it can still feel strange to “go out” with your coworkers. Maybe they’ve been going to happy hours every Thursday and as the new kid, it can be pretty intimidating. “It’s always worth giving it a try because it can be a great opportunity, but if you’re there and you just feel anxious and uncomfortable the whole time, don’t torture yourself and just leave.” Franklin said.

There’s also no need to feel pressured into drinking. Whatever your reason may be for staying sober you shouldn’t have to explain yourself, and no one will judge you for ordering a diet coke. Franklin also added that if you do feel nervous about someone potentially asking you why you’re not drinking, then you can always go up to the bartender and ask for seltzer with a lime in a drink glass and pretend it’s a vodka soda.

Being under 21 doesn’t mean you can’t be included

You might think being under the drinking age will stop you from having great casual conversation with your coworkers, but there are plenty of times you can still be included. An “in-office” happy hour will be an ideal situation for you: you can mingle sans alcohol, stay as long as you want, and there’s no risk of being turned away. But even in a casual setting like this it’s still important to remember do not drink, even if you won’t technically get “caught” here.

“You never know how other people are going to feel about it. Even if your supervisor says it’s okay to drink, someone else might be a stickler for the rules and not approve, so just don’t!” said Franklin.

If you don’t want to miss out on the after hours team bonding opportunity outside the office, then there’s still a good chance you can go and stick to the soda. “Most spots didn’t give me a hard time for just ordering water, and I’m glad I bit the bullet to have the chance to spend time with colleagues outside of the office,” offered Meg, who interned at a large nonprofit organization over the summer. The only issue here is some bars do card you upon arrival, and you risk getting turned away at the door. You can avoid this uncomfortable occurrence by asking a fellow coworker what the place is like, or even looking it up online beforehand to get an idea.

Going to happy hour can be a chance to talk to the people you work with in a different setting and have more personal or casual conversations. However, it’s important to make lasting professional impressions – so make sure you use your best judgement when hitting up a happy hour with your coworkers.